A friend recently shared an article on social media about a mom and her 5 year old daughter who decided together to create their own magazine, Kazoo. This magazine is targeted at young girls- to instill in them more confidence and self-worth; to help them realize their voice is important and should be heard. What a great idea to help us grow a more confident generation of young women.
I also recently purchased the book The Gutsy Girl: Escapades for your Life of Epic Adventure by Caroline Paul. This book is also geared toward younger girls. It encourages girls to live a more confident life of fun and adventure. Although it isn't meant for adults, I just had to have it! And by reading this book, I have learned a little more about myself and the journey I am on in my life.
I've also read several other articles and blogs about raising strong, confident, brave daughters. After all, as parents, we are, in large part, responsible for helping our daughters embrace their confident, brave selves. We are responsible for encouraging them to believe in themselves and allowing them to do the things that will make them truly believe that they can do anything. We must step back and allow them to fall and to fail and then encourage them not to give up. Because through failure, we learn and eventually, if we keep trying, we can soar. But our daughters will never soar if we don't allow them the freedom to explore and to learn on their own, to fall down and to pick themselves back up again. We have to let them do for themselves...we can't try to protect them from everything nor can we do everything for them.
When I was growing up, I was taught to be careful, to be safe, to follow the rules, not to challenge things-not to challenge myself. I was taught about obligations and duty. And in some ways those lessons are important. I think it is important to teach our children to care for others, to be helpful and courteous. I think it is important to teach our children not to be reckless and to follow through on commitments. I also think it is important to teach our children the importance of family. But in addition, we need to teach them to be self-reliant and independent and a little bit fearless.
I was thinking recently that I wish I could go back in time and raise my daughter all over again. Not because I think I did a bad job the first time, but because I feel like I could do it so much better now. Yes, I am guilty of feeling mom doubts. I'm sure all moms have them at times, some of us are better at dealing with them than others are, too, I'm sure. Like I said before, I don't think I did a bad job as a mom and my kid turned out pretty darn awesome. But if I could go back with the knowledge and greater sense of self that I have now, I think I could have been a much better mom.
I wonder sometimes if I pushed her too much or too little; if I guided her in the wrong directions; if I forced her to do things she wouldn't have done if I would have allowed her to be true to herself. I wonder if my insecurities made her insecure in areas too. I wonder if I didn't support her enough or if, maybe, I supported her too much. I wonder if I allowed her enough space to explore and discover her own inner beauty and her own self-worth. Or did I force her to fit some sort of mold for the kind of life that I thought was best for her.
I wonder if I made it clear to her that I truly believed that she could be anything she wanted to be. She could do anything she wanted to do. And more than anything, I wonder if she really understands how much she is loved and all that really matters to me is her happiness and well-being.
I would love to sit with her and ask her those questions and get real, honest answers from her...but I wonder if she'd be really honest with me or if she would keep some things from me for fear of hurting my feelings. Or maybe I fear hearing the real answers because then I'd have regrets for raising her the way I did...and I'd be unable to "fix" what I did wrong.
But then I talk to her. We have just a normal, everyday conversation and I am so proud of the person she is. I love the fact that she isn't afraid to speak her mind. I love that she is opinionated and strong-willed and willing to think for herself. She isn't afraid to be different or to think differently. And she isn't afraid to tell me when I'm being ridiculous...or annoying. She is kind and caring. She has a big, loving heart. She is a strong young woman who is out making a difference in the world just by living each day the way she chooses.
And who could ask for anymore for their child?
I also recently purchased the book The Gutsy Girl: Escapades for your Life of Epic Adventure by Caroline Paul. This book is also geared toward younger girls. It encourages girls to live a more confident life of fun and adventure. Although it isn't meant for adults, I just had to have it! And by reading this book, I have learned a little more about myself and the journey I am on in my life.
I've also read several other articles and blogs about raising strong, confident, brave daughters. After all, as parents, we are, in large part, responsible for helping our daughters embrace their confident, brave selves. We are responsible for encouraging them to believe in themselves and allowing them to do the things that will make them truly believe that they can do anything. We must step back and allow them to fall and to fail and then encourage them not to give up. Because through failure, we learn and eventually, if we keep trying, we can soar. But our daughters will never soar if we don't allow them the freedom to explore and to learn on their own, to fall down and to pick themselves back up again. We have to let them do for themselves...we can't try to protect them from everything nor can we do everything for them.
When I was growing up, I was taught to be careful, to be safe, to follow the rules, not to challenge things-not to challenge myself. I was taught about obligations and duty. And in some ways those lessons are important. I think it is important to teach our children to care for others, to be helpful and courteous. I think it is important to teach our children not to be reckless and to follow through on commitments. I also think it is important to teach our children the importance of family. But in addition, we need to teach them to be self-reliant and independent and a little bit fearless.
I was thinking recently that I wish I could go back in time and raise my daughter all over again. Not because I think I did a bad job the first time, but because I feel like I could do it so much better now. Yes, I am guilty of feeling mom doubts. I'm sure all moms have them at times, some of us are better at dealing with them than others are, too, I'm sure. Like I said before, I don't think I did a bad job as a mom and my kid turned out pretty darn awesome. But if I could go back with the knowledge and greater sense of self that I have now, I think I could have been a much better mom.
I wonder sometimes if I pushed her too much or too little; if I guided her in the wrong directions; if I forced her to do things she wouldn't have done if I would have allowed her to be true to herself. I wonder if my insecurities made her insecure in areas too. I wonder if I didn't support her enough or if, maybe, I supported her too much. I wonder if I allowed her enough space to explore and discover her own inner beauty and her own self-worth. Or did I force her to fit some sort of mold for the kind of life that I thought was best for her.
I wonder if I made it clear to her that I truly believed that she could be anything she wanted to be. She could do anything she wanted to do. And more than anything, I wonder if she really understands how much she is loved and all that really matters to me is her happiness and well-being.
I would love to sit with her and ask her those questions and get real, honest answers from her...but I wonder if she'd be really honest with me or if she would keep some things from me for fear of hurting my feelings. Or maybe I fear hearing the real answers because then I'd have regrets for raising her the way I did...and I'd be unable to "fix" what I did wrong.
But then I talk to her. We have just a normal, everyday conversation and I am so proud of the person she is. I love the fact that she isn't afraid to speak her mind. I love that she is opinionated and strong-willed and willing to think for herself. She isn't afraid to be different or to think differently. And she isn't afraid to tell me when I'm being ridiculous...or annoying. She is kind and caring. She has a big, loving heart. She is a strong young woman who is out making a difference in the world just by living each day the way she chooses.
And who could ask for anymore for their child?
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